Turmoil

This week has been full of emotions.

Excitement and joy as a long-dreamt goal was fulfilled.

Sadness and bewilderment as a situation arises that is something no-one wants to face.

And God says:

Be still. (1)

And I try. I do. But there is a restlessness in me. A desire to put it all right, to work on the next goal, to ease the sadness. To go, to do, to speak, to act. I toss and turn in my mind. Am I making this up? This word from God? Is it convenient for me to hear it? Do I know it so well that I want to hear it? Could I not also hear:

Go and do likewise? (2)

or perhaps:

Seek first the Kingdom of God? (3)

Which is right? God first. I know, I know. But I don’t remember God ever asking us to be so heavenly minded we are no earthly good. Did He? Am I wrong here?

And I hear Him say:

My peace I leave with you … let not your heart be troubled, neither be afraid (4)

Afraid? Perhaps I am afraid in my seeking for an answer as I do not know what lies ahead.

Only God knows.

Only God.

So, for the moment I return to the first word. To sit, and listen. To soak in His Word. Not for long, for time is pressing. But just to give Him the chance to tell me what to do.

Here I am, Lord. Still and quiet, in Your presence …

  1. Psalm 46:10
  2. Luke 10:37
  3. Matthew 6:33
  4. John 14::27
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